Beware the Ego Trap of Selflessness

dont try just beI come across people talking about ego a lot. About how one needs to set aside ego, and how ego is what leads to fear, and most especially about how they personally are no longer trapped by ego.

And I have found that many have gotten in a bit of a paradox. In their claims that they are no longer trapped by ego, they have themselves actually become trapped in their own ego.

Consider this – how much time and ego is invested in maintaining the illusion, and convincing yourself and others, that you are no longer bound by ego?

What is ego anyway? – It’s your sense of self in this world. Ego, when out of balance, definitely can lead to greed, selfishness, and even fear. But, lack of all sense of sense, can lead to problems as well. Unless you are living in an ashram or temple somewhere with no worldly burdens or responsibilities.

My own lack of awareness of personal boundaries, which comes from having a healthy ego, has over the years led me to moving into and staying in mentally and emotionally abusive relationships, and also to a difficulty in feeling and identifying emotions (because I was never sure if what I was feeling was my own or someone else’s emotion, and because I allowed myself to be influenced by others who told me that what I was feeling was not valid), and even a decreased awareness of what I like and don’t like in life.

The past 3 years have been a time of discovery for me as I try to work out – Do I like this TV show? Do I like this food? What sort of exercise do I like? Do I like video games? What is my identity in life? In many ways it as been a discovery not of what do I want, but what do I not want.

One of the biggest things I have discovered is that I have no desire to become selfless. I don’t want to become enlightened.

I do however, sit back and observe those in the world around me. I have found that many people have a lot of energy, and ego, invested in maintaining this illusion that they are without ego. The irony is not lost on me when I come across a group of people each trying to outdo the others in just how self-less they are. And you would just be happier / a better healer / more at one with the Universe / and so forth if you could let go your ego and become as selfless as I am.

Most recently, it was someone telling me that as a healer I had to become the hollow bone through which healing flows. To which I responded, You cannot discount the importance of the hollow bone, or straw, in the healing process. If you think a straw isn’t important, just try drinking a soda through a plastic lid without one.

Liber Divinorum Operum - Hildegard von Bingen

I don’t know how skilled you are, but when I try to do that I end up with a soft drink spilled down my front, and very little actually in my mouth.

Does ego need to be set aside when doing healing work? Absolutely! Ego leads to the healer becoming invested in

achieving a specific outcome. And sometimes that desired outcome is not the one which the client wants or needs.

This setting aside of ego though is a temporary happening though. Once the healing is completed and our links together have been released, then ego and that sense of self – This is me, this is my body, these are my boundaries. That is you, that is your body, those are your boundaries. – can move back in place.

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4 Comments

Filed under Healing Practice

4 responses to “Beware the Ego Trap of Selflessness

  1. Pingback: My Pagan Values and Ethics | Writings of a Pagan Witch

  2. Oh, I love this! People tell you that the most hilarous things. I’ve been guilty of it in the past. For example” Oh, I have gotten rid of MY Ego. It has me in fits now.
    They develop a sense of self about their lack of one. I love the universe’s sense of irony.
    Oh, you are a healer too? People get so caught up in that.

  3. Pingback: Being Grateful for the Little Things | Writings of a Pagan Witch

  4. Pingback: Who Are You Trying to Heal? | The Healing Room

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